Posted in Book Reviews

God’s Story, Your Story [Chapter 6]

Chapter 6: When God’s Story Becomes Yours… Your Final Chapter Becomes A Preface

Click me to read the previous chapter.

Most of the time we like stories to have peaceful and happy endings. The fairy tales we read or heard as kids ended with “and they lived happily ever after” and it pleases us. As we grow up, we learn to see the reality of life that not everyone can have a happy ending. But we can actually meet a peaceful and fortunate ending. And our ending is not the end, it is a preface to a new life.

We often make plans for the near future. We set our eyes on the things we need and want during the journey, but what about the end of the journey? Often times, we make ourselves busy with things that will help us survive our life here on earth like our studies, our jobs, etc. But what about after our stay on earth? Save the rapture of the saints, we are bound to die. I repeat we are all going to die.

What man is he that liveth, and shall not see death? shall he deliver his soul from the hand of the grave? Selah.

-Psalm 89:48 (KJV)

And as it is appointed unto men once to die, but after this the judgment:

-Hebrews 9:27(KJV)

We cannot prevent death. It is our fate to die, save the return of Christ.  Death is scary. It’s like a deadline we don’t want to come. Game over. But we can’t avoid it. Our journey here on earth isn’t everything. There is a part two. A sequel. And because of the resurrection of Christ, death can just be our entrance to another life and an eternal one.

When Jesus was crucified, everybody thought death had won. The enemy was doing some happy dance. Christ, the savior of men, was dead. The disciples were mourning. Despite the fact that Jesus made a promise to them that He will rise on the third day after the crucifixion, the disciples were so hopeless even to believe the words of the Lord. But then comes the resurrection story. The enemy’s victory party was cut short. The Lord’s promise came true. He crushed death’s head on the third day. He was perfectly alive doing things the living can do.

Luke 24

  • 39 Behold my hands and my feet, that it is I myself: handle me, and see; for a spirit hath not flesh and bones, as ye see me have.
  • 40 And when he had thus spoken, he shewed them his hands and his feet.
  • 41 And while they yet believed not for joy, and wondered, he said unto them, Have ye here any meat?
  • 42 And they gave him a piece of a broiled fish, and of an honeycomb.
  • 43 And he took it, and did eat before them.

        His resurrection story can be our story, too! Our death can be a preface to a new and everlasting life with Him. Death can just be our transition to the next life. It is not the ending for us. God is faithful to his promises. He will make sure those who have been faithful to Him until the last days, even brought down by death, will live with Him in His kingdom. All glory and honor to Him!

 

John 11:25 – Jesus said unto her, I am the resurrection, and the life: he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live:
John 5:21 – For as the Father raiseth up the dead, and quickeneth [them]; even so the Son quickeneth whom he will.

The Lord would like to remind us today that earth is just our temporary vessel. There is something more important than just living on earth: it is living with and for Jesus.

I want to include here my prayer during this morning:

Lord, I praise and thank you for reminding me that the world is just our temporary vessel.  Do not let me be swayed by the enemy’s tactics. Help me to overcome the world as you did. Help me to wait patiently for you. Lord, I am sorry for my mistakes and disobedience from time to time. My flesh is weak but I know You will make the spirit strong. I humbly ask for your mercy and grace today. help me to always listen to your voice and not be confused with my own voice, Help me not to give into temptations. Help us to be prepared always. Lord, we believe in your promises. You are always faithful, Lord, even in times when we are not faithful.

I pray this in the name of Jesus, Amen.

whatliezelreads 

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Posted in Tags

This or That Tag

Thanking AC of  Books and a Cup of Coffee  for tagging me! (last September 2016!!!!)  Sorry for the late response! I was just too busy with school and everything. But I’m happy to answer the following questions. 🙂


QUESTIONS:

READING ON THE COUCH or IN BED?

Bed. There are more options for reading positions. 😉

MALE MAIN CHARACTER or FEMALE MAIN CHARACTER?

Female. More relatable, obviously. Haha.

SWEET SNACKS or SALTY SNACKS? 

Salty! Sweets would just make my throat dry and would probably cause me tonsillitis.

TRILOGIES or QUARTETS?

Trilogies. I prefer shorter series, at least, now.

FIRST PERSON POV or THIRD PERSON POV?

First person. Because it is more felt.

READING AT NIGHT or IN THE MORNING?

It actually depends on my schedule and the book that I’m reading. But I usually read more during the night. So night it is.

LIBRARIES or BOOKSTORES?

If the library would have fiction and YA novels and nice librarians like the library we had in high school, then libraries.

BOOKS THAT MAKE YOU LAUGH or BOOKS THAT MAKE YOU CRY?

Books that make me cry. I like deep things. I like crying over a book. :(((( Hahaha.

BLACK BOOK COVERS or WHITE BOOK COVERS?

White. They look so cleeeaaaan.

CHARACTER DRIVEN or PLOT DRIVEN STORIES?

Plot driven because I super love plot twists.


Rules

  • Mention the creator of the tag
  • Thank the blogger who tagged you
  • Choose one of the options for each question (and explain it if you want to)
  • Tag 10 other people

 

Tagging:

The Tattooed Book Geek

The Book Raven

Kristin Kraves Books

Geek Girl Speaks

mugglebooks

alyssaisreading

FictionFan

Thrice Read

Ballyroan Reads 

Breeny’s Books

 

whatliezelreads

 

Posted in Book Reviews

Bumped (Book Review)

 

Author: Megan McCafferty

Pregnant teens were the most important people. Surrogacy was the top career chased. Babies were sold. All these because of one reason: the Virus had caused anyone above 18 to be infertile. Bumped took teen pregnancy into a whole new level. It was funny and scary at the same time.


Glimpse:

Somewhere in the future, Melody was raised to be perfect for breeding. Her foster parents, both intelligent species, predicted that someday teenagers will be the only ones who can be impregnated. Having this knowledge, they did everything to make Melody ready for the market.  However, they weren’t able to predict that, Harmony, Melody’s twin sister, will be able to make things complicated.

Melody was raised in the city while Harmony raised near the farm as a church girl. Their goals and beliefs were contradicting. As Melody was about to fulfill a contract with the hottest male RePro in the world, Harmony tangled things.  As Harmony tries to convince Melody into coming with her to the Goodside, the place where she was raised, she finds herself lost in Melody’s life.

Despite the knot Harmony caused in Melody’s life,  a good relationship knot was also established between them. And as they made their choices, they took the road to self-discovery.


Comments:

What I really liked about this book, however not emphasized,  is its values on how we should look at people beyond their looks or their surface or in this story, their capability of breeding for money. People are beyond what you see. People must be valued for their insides, their minds. One thing this book has pointed out is that sometimes people are doing things because the world is doing it and because it’s just the way things are. People forget that they can be different, that they can do things differently. Sometimes we get caught on just surviving instead of thinking about what we actually want to do. One of the lessons you can get from this book is that how you are raised won’t determine what / who you will be when you grow up.

One thing I loved about this book is projecting what love really means. True love means refusing better or even the best things for something very special to us. It means searching but not finding anyone or anything that can substitute or even come close to something or someone we hold dear. It means giving all you have and all that you are to that special person. It means being exclusive just for one person. My heart was melting with just the right amount of romance in this book.

The futuristic concepts included in this book are pretty cool too. Like having blinks and winks as passwords for their iM’s or in our case more like a messenger. I also like the fact that Harmony, even raised up in church and was being constantly reminded to be pure and to be holy, committed a sin no one in the Goodside would ever imagine she would. I don’t like the idea of committing sin. I liked the idea shown in the book that nobody is immune from sin, that we are all vulnerable to mistakes. And just like Harmony, we should be responsible for our mistakes and be ready for the consequences.

Random: I just think there are far better names than “Melody” and “Harmony”. I have a twin sister and I’m thanking my parents for not naming us like that!

Anyways, it was a good book. And guess what? After more or less two weeks of finishing the book, just today, I found out that there was book 2! I didn’t know it was part of a series. We bought it as a second-hand in a bookstore.  And I’m crushed because I’m currently starting Hollow City (2nd book of Miss Peregrine’s Peculiar Children) and I hate reading books of a series nonconsecutively. :((((

That’s all for book 1 (BOOK 1!!). Hoping to read Thumped, soon. God bless! Thanks for reading this book review!  🙂whatliezelreads

 

 

Posted in My Written Works

Things I Tell Myself

 

How much longer will you hold back a love intended for yourself?                                        Don’t make yourself too busy looking at other people’s gardens.
Let your own flowers bloom and unfold.
Because you’re not meant to just gape and glum at other people’s field of flowers.
You are meant to have your own.

 

whatliezelreads

Posted in Thoughts Out Loud

Someone Will Take Care of Your Cares

          As I grew up, I developed this anxiety mostly for academic stuff. I worry fast about deadlines, due dates, scores, grades, and whatnot. I always worry that I wouldn’t be able to meet other’s expectations and MY expectations. I am worried that I might disappoint someone if I don’t do good at school and I hate disappointing myself, too. I believe that I wasn’t born bright and smart. I always work hard for good grades. They don’t come from my natural skills. It’s like I was somewhat determined to study harder than my lazy side is implying. (But it wasn’t like my parents forced me to. It was something that resembles a habit. It was like developing a habit to study for good grades.) If you even ask my opinion, I would and could say that I have so much room for improvement because I know I can do better, I just won’t because of some reasons (which includes my laziness at times).

               Aaaaand enough for the background story. I just want to share how God showed that even our little cares should be surrendered to Him. This might sound petty but I am just thankful that I don’t have to carry my burdens and worries alone, that I can finally depend on Someone better than me or anyone.

          I am currently on my third year in college, the second semester. (The hardest semester, as I was told). Every time I have something to do regarding academics, I tend to plan on my own, to depend on my own ability. My thinking was always “I can do this.” There’s nothing wrong with motivating myself, but to completely handle things on my own, to carry the burden alone, to bring my worry everywhere, it wasn’t healthy and it wasn’t right.

            There were many instances where I thought I could handle things neatly and properly on my own but ended up not actually hitting my target. There were many instances that I was too confident on my own and ended up disappointing myself. But God has some suggestions. I always knew that I should  ( and always told to, by reading the Bible, listening to some songs, or by some voice in my head) cast ALL my cares on Him. But I was used to handling some things, specifically my academics and academic-related stuff on my own, thinking that I am good enough to handle them. But then I realized that I was always getting eaten up by worries and stress and fears and not always getting enough sleep and yet not getting my wanted results. I always feel restless and tired because besides on my weariness from doing all the work, I always have this whispering anxiety and worry in my head, constantly reminding me of the deadlines. It was clear that something has to be done. I have no peace thinking about my worries, my fear of having failures. I tend to wear out myself and sometimes not getting what I really wish. But then I chose not to worry too much and chose to depend on Him more than depending on my own, and changes began to show themselves. I tried to do it my way and ended up just tired and still worried constantly then God whispered “Try it my way. Try it with me”.

            Recently I changed my mindset whenever deadlines and exams are up ahead. Instead of making plans on my own and panicking and worrying immediately, I can now calm myself and look on the positive side. Whenever some things have to be done I always choose to pray and tell God that every little thing– whether a project, a simple assignment (yes, I do stress myself even with a small homework), an upcoming exam– are surrendered to Him. I am developing aa habit of praying and being confident that He would help me and He would be there working with me. And I am really glad about the results and changes.

           First, I observed myself to be calmer and not too stressed out whenever I encounter problems. I don’t get mental panic attacks anymore. I save more time doing what I have to do and not worrying. I am more relaxed now. I still worry and get stressed sometimes, but I can now easily detach myself from them. I don’t have to be ‘praning’ that much anymore!

       Second, I get better results. Sometimes, I even get more than what I expect. (Thank you, Lord!)

          Third, God provides the answer even before I pray about it!

          The lesson I learned is that even my little cares in life should be surrendered to Him. I should always think that He can control anything. I should always think that I have help greater than any help I could get on my own. I learned to depend on Him even more. I learned to get my confidence from Him and not from myself.  I learned that doing things with God creates better results. God is faithful to help us if we completely trust in Him.

Commit thy works unto the LORD, and thy thoughts shall be established. -Proverbs 16:3

Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?- Matthew 6:27

Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you. – 1 Peter 5:7

whatliezelreads

Posted in Book Reviews

Forgive me, Leonard Peacock [Book Review]

13477676

I really don’t know how to start this properly. I just want to say, READ THIS BOOK, LET IT RIP YOUR SOUL TO SHREDS, LET IT INFLICT YOU MISERY AND ANGUISH YOU HAVE NEVER FELT BEFORE. It’s a great book. Okay, maybe that was an exaggeration but it really did hit me emotionally.

I have read this book twice but the pain and heaviness weren’t less the second time; it was even worse. It wasn’t the type of pain that made me bawl but it was that kind where I had to put the book down and do nothing for a fraction of a moment because it was all too much.

The beginning was already catchy for me. The events never subsided my curiosity for what comes next, they intensified it instead.

Leonard Peacock, induced by anger, grief, and thirst for vengeance ( and probably for freedom), decided he must kill his classmate and former friend, Asher Beal and kill himself afterward. But before that, he wanted to leave presents for each of his friends. It was the day of his eighteenth birthday, which even his own mother has not remembered, that he decided to put an end to his misery.

The flow of the story was intense. It was the kind of story that will make you want to finish the book immediately. The story is really heavy because it talks about a sensitive topic. I could say that the book is a bit disturbing and depressing but it is beautiful. The story will leave you restless unless you finish it right away.

The second time that I’ve read this is because we picked it to be read for our book club. And we discussed the essential points of the story and the characters as well. I appreciated it more and it made me realize that the book is deeper than the first time I thought.

The book was more than a book. It was packed with so much emotions and deep eye-openers. It made me want to have more understanding and care of the people I am surrounded every day.

I think the book will be helpful to those who are thinking about ending their lives because of the problems they are facing, to those who are struggling for reasons to live when there are so many reasons to kill themselves. I think one of the greatest points of the book is how we can find hope and love from the right people. I am very proud of the main character, Leonard, for being brave and for being so much than ordinary in a good way. He was sure flawed, but him being flawed was kind of logical and reasonable. Despite the huge mess he got into, he was able to grow from it. I did pity him so much, though. I really felt bad for him when I was reading the book like I want to talk to him. But the book showed his progress from that mess and it will just make you want to hug Leonard if you could.

This book has really so much to say about this world, and the people living in it. I really love the book and I really recommend this book to my friends (I would even force them to read it). I am really glad I found this book.

whatliezelreads

Posted in Thoughts Out Loud

What God taught me on 2016

2016 , for me, was probably the most interesting and challenging year so far (and most likely the worst, idk) . It was because so much had happened that helped me emotionally, mentally, spiritually and perhaps physically.

People say there’s always room for improvement. I never thought I’d receive so much chastening from above this year. The thing is, I thought I was okay, that I was doing fine just being what I like to be, just deciding what I want to do for myself. But I was wrong and I made bad choices. God made me realize things through difficult and uncomfortable situations. Unfortunately, I had to learn them the hard way.

(Okay these are just the things I can recall while writing this post)

  • Never expect things to last and accept things that are out of your control.

          Try not to hope too much that what you have will last. I have hoped too much to some things and it just caused me pain and sadness. Good thing, I eventually got over them and learned that things here on earth are really temporary and one has to learn how to let go. Expectations are not really good things to keep.

  • Really expect the unexpected and take courage on making decisions and facing the consequences. 

          Ha! So much had happened just within a year and many of them really surprised me. Some events didn’t even cross my mind to happen but they did. (I’m keeping them vague for some important reasons) I made great friends with people I didn’t expect to be friends with. I made a really quick decision joining a school organization which is unlikely of me because usually I don’t like making hasty decisions but surprise, surprise. And it was sort of out of my comfort zone,  being with people I don’t really know but I made it!

       I didn’t also expect to disappoint myself that much but I have to accept that I am utterly flawed. I discovered that I was really selfish and probably too proud. And I made one of the worst decisions that caused me days (or weeks, or months) of guilt and hurting. I was too focused on myself and what I think is right that I forgot that what really matters is to love and love and love because it is what God wants me to do. (I won’t discuss this furthermore bec I might write lengthy paragraphs about it and I wrote a blog post about it anyway so, moving on)

      These experiences have made me. They were great lessons and I wouldn’t have seen my pride and selfishness if they didn’t happen. Another good thing, the problem was fixed before the year ended. I am thankful that God opened my heart to see things more clearly. He taught me that when we don’t get what we want from people around us, hating isn’t the answer. God made me see that I needed some fixing. I was too proud that I wasn’t able to see that I was the problem. God helped me through it. I know He was the one that helped me accept the things that are hard to accept. I never liked being corrected but God wanted me to grow. Though it was stressful and painful, I am thankful it happened. I won’t do that same mistake again. I’m doing my best and I’m trusting God to help me.

  • Really learn to prioritize. There’s no term “too busy”, it’s just a matter of prioritizing.

         I’m currently in third year college and you know what they say, it’s the busiest year for college students. And I must admit it was a pretty hectic schedule. Plus I was applying for a school organization and joined a band before the first semester ended. I was too busy and too stressed and too sleep deprived to have a healthy spiritual life. I was trying to arrange my priorities as follows: God first before everything else. But I must admit I got distracted and I lost my focus on what I should do first that I kind of took not enough care for my soul.  For the last months of 2016, instead of reading the Bible and having short devotions every day, it became every other day, and when there were piles of requirements, I forgot or got no time for reading at all. It was another guilt trip. My soul was being compromised while I was too busy taking care of things that are supposed to be second on my list of priorities. Thank God, before the year ended, I had come to my senses and made a decision not to be neglectful on things that really matter, on things that are beyond this world. I will make an effort to really feed my soul and to focus on God more this coming year.

  • Life isn’t a competition. I don’t always have to be on top.

        I can really say that I am grade conscious. I easily get upset when I don’t get the grade or score I really want to get. And sometimes, even if I try my best, I can’t be the best. One thing that I learned and embraced more from 2016 is accepting that I won’t always get the things I aim, that some things are not really for me simply because they aren’t for me. I’ve learned that I don’t have to worry about who’s better than me. Instead, I need to focus on my own improvement, to work on my weaknesses,  to develop my strengths and to accept my defeat.

2016 might not be my best year but I think it was the year that made me better.


Thank you for reading this lengthy post and I hope you enjoyed it. (Though, probably you don’t actually care and really got bored and skipped to the last part)

I’m hoping to be better and not to commit the same mistakes again. I’m praying for a more fruitful year. God bless! 🙂

whatliezelreads

Posted in Book Reviews

A Kiss In Time [Book Review]

It’s been a long time since my last book review. (I missed this so much).

a-kiss-in-time

Author: Alex Flinn

This is my third book from Alex Flinn and I have some things I need to say but let’s save that for later.

First things first. To those who aren’t familiar with Alex Flinn, her books are fairy tales with a twist. Yes, that sounds exciting. And with the title, you can already conclude that this is about sleeping beauty. It started off as the normal sleeping beauty story except the name of the princess here is Talia. We all know the story.  Talia shouldn’t touch spindles because if she does, the whole kingdom will fall into a deep sleep and will remain sleeping unless a courageous young man kisses her with a true love’s kiss.

Okay, I must admit I was pretty hooked by the book at first since when I started it, I didn’t want to put it down (but I had to bec my projects and requirements wouldn’t finish themselves).  I read like the 3/4 of the story first, and it was going so well. Then I haven’t been able to continue the book until maybe a couple of weeks later and I don’t know if it’s the time gap, because , all of a sudden,  the magic dwindled.


Now let’s talk about what I like about this book.

What I like about this book is the comparison of the modern world and the world 300 years ago. The point is, it shows the difference between the world where technology isn’t a thing yet and a world where technology rules. It showed how some things change and how some things don’t.

Probably what I truly love about the story is how true love is viewed. It emphasized that true love will always pursue despite hardships and hindrances. I truly believe and agree on this. Any guy who really loves a girl will do anything to prove it.

“True love would look a second time. True love would not be thwarted. True love would not accept no for an answer. He would search the world and certainly look again and again in every cottage until he finds you.”

Another thing that I like about the story is fixing the misunderstanding between parents and children. Sometimes the only thing missing is a good and honest communication to really understand each other. And at the end of the day, your family might be the only thing you got. Your family will always have your back.

The romance didn’t really put butterflies in my stomach and I just think the depth of it is not enough for me to feel wonderful. It probably wasn’t deep enough.


Here’s what I can conclude. (It just happened to me twice but I think I can say this) The last pages of the book are disappointing. It’s like her books have a thing of disappointing the readers with the last parts. (Don’t kill me!) But hey, it’s a personal opinion. The endings could be a lot better for you. I wish it was better for me.

It just felt like the author didn’t take much time writing the last part. The lines weren’t so powerful and it felt like it was written for children. I just think it could’ve been written a bit more effectively. It felt like it was lacking something.

All in all, the book is okay but it wasn’t the kind of book that I will talk excitedly about. I must admit I expected much and received less. It wasn’t the kind of book that will be on the top of the list of books that I will recommend to my friends. (Ha. Sorry) But it was worth the chance, I think. But this I know, I won’t get too excited again for another book from Flinn.

whatliezelreads

Posted in Awards

The Sunshine Blogger Award

I was nominated by Megan of Bookslayer Reads for The Sunshine Blogger Award!  Thank you! 🙂

award31

RULES:

  • Thank the person who nominated you and link back to their blog
  • List the rules and display the Sunshine Blogger Award logo in your post or blog
  • Answer the eleven questions sent by the person who nominated you
  • Nominate eleven new blogs to receive the award and write them eleven new questions

QUESTIONS FROM MEGAN:

1.Where do you get most of your books?

My sister and I share books and I think most of our books are from our savings but we do get some sponsors once in a while. By sponsors I meant relatives and friends who are kind enough to buy us books. Cheers to those kind of people! We buy books in almost every bookstore we step into. Well, almost, at least. It can either be a bookstore for secondhand books or a bookstore for new ones.

2. What is your favorite color?

YELLOW! Like the sun. Like cheese. Like happiness. 

3. Pick one: Chocolate, Strawberry, or Vanilla?

Oh chocolate! Definitely chocolate!

4. Do you have any weird OCD habits we should know about?😉

I don’t think I have an actual OCD habit. More like I want things to be logical and to be the way I expect them to be.

5. If you wrote a book, what do you think it’d be about?

 I think it would be about the world’s unfairness to people who are not pretty, those who are flawed physically and not beautiful in society’s standards. I would write to wake up the world from its foolishness.

6. Three words you would use to describe yourself.

Midget. Foodie. Blessed.

7. Do you prefer computer or tablet/phone?

When blogging, I prefer computer.

8. Will you dress up for Halloween? If so, as what?

I don’t really dress up for Halloween but if I would, I’d be someone from a book. (I have no specific character at the moment)

9. If you had one magical power, what would it be and why?

To be able to read minds. I always wanted to see what goes on through people’s mind. And I want to know what they think about me. 😉 Don’t you think it would be fun?

10. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

Probably my height. I’m just too short.:(

11. Name one celebrity that you truly admire or that you find inspirational.

I don’t know if I have one in mind right now.


MY QUESTIONS:

  1. Why did you start blogging?
  2. What book genre is your favorite?
  3. Coffee or tea?
  4. What are your hobbies besides reading?
  5. If you were given a chance to go to a fictional place, where would it be?
  6. If there was a book written about your life, would you read it to the end?
  7. What do you hate the most about a person?
  8. Do you have any weird fetish?
  9. What is your favorite movie?
  10. What is your favorite song?
  11. Do you think you can survive a zombie apocalypse?

NOMINEES:

  1. Andie of bookscoffeeandpassion
  2. Bloggin’ and Writing
  3. Sam of onebookishgirl
  4. Percy of Percy Reads
  5. Pierina of Pierina Reads
  6. Morgan of Happily Ever Bookish
  7. Imo of Muggle Books
  8. Luna of LuniReads
  9. Alyssa of alyssaisreading
  10. Katerina of BookBox by kat
  11. Bookwormaniac

Thanks for reading my answers! 🙂

whatliezelreads

 

 

 

Posted in Thoughts Out Loud

Learning From a Mistake

I figured out that it’s even harder to forgive myself than to forgive other people.

The thing is when you think you were doing something right, maybe, JUST MAYBE, you weren’t. I don’t really get into many conflicts with the persons or things around me. I’ve known myself as a kind of person who weighs every factor before deciding on what to do next. Even if it’s about buying things for myself, or other little things to decide about. I am pretty practical, I guess. I don’t make hasty decisions. And I don’t really want to base my choices with my emotions as much as possible. I want things to be logical. I want things to be the way I want them to be. And when I thought I was being right and wise, that is when I made the wrong decision.

Lately, I became a person I didn’t want myself to be. I became someone I would hate. I became someone who is selfish and probably too proud. I became someone I never expected to be. I saw a side of me that desperately needed some fixing. Because of wanting to be right, because of wanting to be wise, because of wanting for things to be the way I want them to be, I didn’t realize I was building a wall around myself. I didn’t realize I was being a bad friend. I didn’t realize I was building a chasm between me and a friend. I didn’t realize I was doing what a friend did to me that hurt me. I was driven by my pride and negative thoughts. I didn’t realize I wasn’t being a Christian when I chose to do things my way.

Sorry if I’m keeping it vague. I just feel bad about it. And a bit ashamed of myself. And I’m still trying to be free of the guilt. :/

Here are some lessons and reminders I got from my not-so-wise decision:

1.Do not focus on the negative that you see in people. 

Everybody has flaws. Never expect someone to be the way you want them to be so you won’t be too much disappointed.

2. Don’t think of yourself as wise. Don’t always think you are right and someone is wrong just because they don’t have the same way of thinking as you. Don’t get too proud of yourself.

Let no man deceive himself. If any man among you seemeth to be wise in this world, let him become a fool, that he may be wise. -1 Corinthians 3:18

Pride goeth before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall.-Proverbs 16:18

We then that are strong ought to bear the infirmities of the weak, and not to please ourselves -Romans 15:1

 For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man that is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly, according as God hath dealt to every man the measure of faith. -Romans 12:3

3. Always do good. Always choose being kind. Always pursue peace.

I wasn’t pursuing peace when I built the wall, the chasm. I thought I was getting rid of some toxic while doing that. I thought it was wise. But it wasn’t. It wasn’t kind. It wasn’t good. I wasn’t being an instrument of peace.

Depart from evil, and do good; seek peace, and pursue it. – Psalms 34:14

If it is possible, as much as lieth in you, live peacefully with all men. -Romans 12:18

4. ALWAYS CHOOSE TO LOVE.

I believe I wasn’t doing an act of love when I decided to be cold and distant. I forgot for a moment my responsibility as a child of God to love.

Beloved, if God so loved us, we ought also to love one another.- 1 John 4:11

5. Make sure that when you are protecting yourself from things, you don’t turn away people.

It’s good to be cautious, but never build walls. Don’t be selfish. :/

6. Always remember that your judgments are not facts. Your opinions are flawed.

It is one of my greatest weaknesses, I’m just too fast in giving judgments. And maybe I got used to holding on to them because most of the time, my judgments were right. But I realize, it wasn’t nice seeing people through your judgments.

Let us not therefore judge one another any more: but judge this rather, that no man put a stumbling block or an occasion to fall in his brother’s way. – Romans 14:13

This is probably a wake up alarm from God, reminding me to handle situations in a better way, in a Christ-like way. I should’ve asked myself, “What would Jesus do?” and maybe I didn’t get lost.

I don’t think I can elaborate things much further. I just know I made a mistake and I’ll make sure I’m going to learn from it. Though, I’m still working on setting myself free from the guilt, I’m sure I’ll heal.

“MR. BROWNE’S SEPTEMBER PRECEPT:

WHEN GIVEN THE CHOICE BETWEEN BEING
RIGHT OR BEING KIND, CHOOSE KIND.”
R.J. Palacio, Wonder

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